凌晨00.18
下雨天
配上 蔡健雅的旋律
我：HI^^
他：HI~
我：还是那一句，最近好吗？
他：不好。
我：哦.怎么啦？没事吧....?
他：生活压力。
我：还以为可以找你发射下我的负面能量呢~结果...你也不开心...
他：你怎么啦？
我放下了平时的理智，告诉了他我
很荒谬，很幼稚的梦想
我嗅到了 淡淡的 回忆
打闹的对白
他：在干吗？
我：在MSN咯~
他：不是拉~是生活~
我：我报读了“婚礼策划师”的课...
他：哦？
我：以后结婚找我哦，我打五折^^！
我：（心）.....
他：不要仙家~
我：友情价嘛！哈哈....
我：（心）.....
他：哈哈，算你啦!
--------
外面下着雨，在打着明天要交的作业...
我：你在干嘛？怎么还没睡啊？
（今天难得我找你....可以陪多我下下吗....如果你不介意的话....）
他：我最近五个月都5点才睡啊~
他：和她说话的时间只有在这时候....
我：（心）....
我：哈哈（...）！！怎么以前和你一起的时候都不懂你那么浪漫的啊?
(这问题蠢得好笑...)
(难怪，最近看到你都很迟下线，还以为你在打游戏机呢...原来你每一晚都留到那么迟，就是在等着和她的说话时间....)
我：你在和她聊天吗？
他：嗯...
我：（心）....
他：没关系的^^
我：你在和她聊天....真的没关系吗....？
我：（心）....
(没有等到他回答...)
我：我没关系的^^
我：（心）.....
我：（泪从眼睛滑了两行...）
结果他真的没关系...
他：（没有再回复我了....）
我：（应该在和她谈天吧....）
我:喂，祝你 幸福啊！！
我：（心）.....
他：谢谢！你也是^^
(没再回复....)
____________________________________________________________
为什么还是要那么的温柔
告诉我你要陪他就好了阿
为什么还要顾我的感受
还要说没关系的
为什么和你说话的时候
让我很亲切，很舒服
总是很想把所有的事告诉你
很想和你分享我的生活
我的幼稚
在我最想找人的时候
你总是我最想找
可是却是我不能找的人
明明你只在等着和她谈天的机会
请不要 还体贴的说 没关系
我的心 很平静
都三年了
也习惯了．．．．
因为 你不是我的
没有让我伤心的理由
只是泪会没感觉的滑下来....
嗯....
我没有怎样．．．
埋头继续打作业.....
凌晨０１．００
BY WAH
作者：很漂亮的故事和感受．．．我喜欢︿︿
I M BeLONGs tO MInE
16.7.10
11.7.10
The WoRdS EsCaPe ME
I found a lyrics that is pretty suit for my mood now....
It is about a person who is facing some language problem....
likes mentioned what i m feeling recently...
THe WorDs EsCaPe Me..
I was standing on a train platform in a foreign land.
I was 21 years old,
Excited to be involved,and to do my part,to understand everything I was told.
But they moved too quickly,talked too fast,
I couldnt even catch my breath,
Loud,too loud,I cant understand ur words.
What i was thinking?I cant do this,learn this.
Think i'll go home.
But i cant go home.
I can also use ur words to order only fish.
I m studying hard,but i dont get their jokes.
They think i m stupid;but i cant tell them i m not.
The words I cant escape ,they are hiding my best,you know.
I cant use my tongue.I cant use it like you.
Learn the language,talk the language,learn the language....######
____________________________________________________________________________
Do you know how does it feels when you cant use the language to express urself probably?
I feel like a dumb and so lame.
Many many thought cant express it as well as i think...
worry their respond is with confusing....
sometimes will jux stopped b4 my mouth...
and swallow them back to my tummy...
as the lyric mentioned,when ppl thought u r stupid,u cant even tell them u r not...
admire those ppl who can speak and express their thought fluently and without consider....
It is about a person who is facing some language problem....
likes mentioned what i m feeling recently...
THe WorDs EsCaPe Me..
I was standing on a train platform in a foreign land.
I was 21 years old,
Excited to be involved,and to do my part,to understand everything I was told.
But they moved too quickly,talked too fast,
I couldnt even catch my breath,
Loud,too loud,I cant understand ur words.
What i was thinking?I cant do this,learn this.
Think i'll go home.
But i cant go home.
I can also use ur words to order only fish.
I m studying hard,but i dont get their jokes.
They think i m stupid;but i cant tell them i m not.
The words I cant escape ,they are hiding my best,you know.
I cant use my tongue.I cant use it like you.
Learn the language,talk the language,learn the language....######
____________________________________________________________________________
Do you know how does it feels when you cant use the language to express urself probably?
I feel like a dumb and so lame.
Many many thought cant express it as well as i think...
worry their respond is with confusing....
sometimes will jux stopped b4 my mouth...
and swallow them back to my tummy...
as the lyric mentioned,when ppl thought u r stupid,u cant even tell them u r not...
admire those ppl who can speak and express their thought fluently and without consider....
10.7.10
站在 矛 VS 盾 之间
矛>>>> 我 <<<<< 盾
1)梦想 VS 家
妈：你啊，不需要给我什么。最重要是趁我还有能力的时候，珍惜时间好好给我去读书。我只希望你能大学毕
业。不要担心，你要做什么决定，去学东西，我一定会全力支持你的！
突然....
妈：你们啊太好命！留下我一个老柴奴在这店做。不明白，一大把年纪了还要熬！当你们的家是酒店这样！看那
一天我和你爸爸一样一起睡下去！或是驾车撞死他！你们就尽量用，尽量拿！用完你们的福报！我就在这
里“捱”！
——————————————————————————
还没读书前，我努力地在店帮忙他，帮忙载妹妹，载货，载工人....
读书了（前期）...以上完课就跑去店帮忙做工到晚上放工。
回到家，已经没心要温习了。
第二天，才来追上课程。我觉得这样的生活，很矛盾。
我没办法进步自己学的东西。
现在再加上婚礼的课，那个课，不是那么简单。很多事我都不懂，没经验。
全部突然是英文。老师又无端端丢功课下来，他的功课都不是一两天做的完的。
就算做在功课前面，也未必会回答。
英文，我希望我可以重新复习今天的课，生字，句子，上网看作文，读英文书...
所以最近都很少去店了
很想专心在自己的事上
当我想专心时
突然有一封信息炸过来
心里就很罪恶感，很愧疚
每次从吉隆伯回到加影，就会在交通灯前选择，右去店，还是左回家...
转左 我就会带着罪恶感的心情
转右 那一天，我自己的事就一定做不到的
所以有时候，我宁愿选择找漂亮的餐厅坐着
这样我两边都不用让我选
想我怎样？
一边愧疚，一边读书吗？我也不知道.....
2）野心 VS 坏习惯
我是很贪心的人，什么事都想做到最好，什么事都想学好。
因为，专业会带我很开心 兴奋 和 光荣。
我知道当你的条件天生不比人优秀，你就要花别人的双倍努力，做好！
一就是和别人跑在同一线，甚至跑在别人的前头，绝对不许跑在后面。
花尽所有的管道，把事情做到超棒 是我的 野心
坏习惯
就是
爱拖 有时间就 会让我拖
我总喜欢把事情拖到最后一秒才肯去做
脑子里有很好的点子
可是拖到最后 点子就没有足够的时间做出来
总喜欢把自己逼到墙角
是懒惰吗？
这句话可以鞭策我，
“不是因为事情难我们不敢做；
而是因为我们不敢做事情才会难。”
是不敢吧...还是什么=.=？
野心很想把事情做好，可是因为坏习惯，却让事情没有预期的好，过后就来责怪自己
所以
每次我的第二次 愿意把事做好 因为我第一次衰了
野心>>>>>我<<<<<坏习惯
心理就不断被它们折磨着....
啦啦啦啦啦啦.....
很矛盾。很矛盾。很矛盾。
最后 我 全头都不到岸....=.=
what can i do...>.<
nothing else i can do...
hahahahaha
1)梦想 VS 家
妈：你啊，不需要给我什么。最重要是趁我还有能力的时候，珍惜时间好好给我去读书。我只希望你能大学毕
业。不要担心，你要做什么决定，去学东西，我一定会全力支持你的！
突然....
妈：你们啊太好命！留下我一个老柴奴在这店做。不明白，一大把年纪了还要熬！当你们的家是酒店这样！看那
一天我和你爸爸一样一起睡下去！或是驾车撞死他！你们就尽量用，尽量拿！用完你们的福报！我就在这
里“捱”！
——————————————————————————
还没读书前，我努力地在店帮忙他，帮忙载妹妹，载货，载工人....
读书了（前期）...以上完课就跑去店帮忙做工到晚上放工。
回到家，已经没心要温习了。
第二天，才来追上课程。我觉得这样的生活，很矛盾。
我没办法进步自己学的东西。
现在再加上婚礼的课，那个课，不是那么简单。很多事我都不懂，没经验。
全部突然是英文。老师又无端端丢功课下来，他的功课都不是一两天做的完的。
就算做在功课前面，也未必会回答。
英文，我希望我可以重新复习今天的课，生字，句子，上网看作文，读英文书...
所以最近都很少去店了
很想专心在自己的事上
当我想专心时
突然有一封信息炸过来
心里就很罪恶感，很愧疚
每次从吉隆伯回到加影，就会在交通灯前选择，右去店，还是左回家...
转左 我就会带着罪恶感的心情
转右 那一天，我自己的事就一定做不到的
所以有时候，我宁愿选择找漂亮的餐厅坐着
这样我两边都不用让我选
想我怎样？
一边愧疚，一边读书吗？我也不知道.....
2）野心 VS 坏习惯
我是很贪心的人，什么事都想做到最好，什么事都想学好。
因为，专业会带我很开心 兴奋 和 光荣。
我知道当你的条件天生不比人优秀，你就要花别人的双倍努力，做好！
一就是和别人跑在同一线，甚至跑在别人的前头，绝对不许跑在后面。
花尽所有的管道，把事情做到超棒 是我的 野心
坏习惯
就是
爱拖 有时间就 会让我拖
我总喜欢把事情拖到最后一秒才肯去做
脑子里有很好的点子
可是拖到最后 点子就没有足够的时间做出来
总喜欢把自己逼到墙角
是懒惰吗？
这句话可以鞭策我，
“不是因为事情难我们不敢做；
而是因为我们不敢做事情才会难。”
是不敢吧...还是什么=.=？
野心很想把事情做好，可是因为坏习惯，却让事情没有预期的好，过后就来责怪自己
所以
每次我的第二次 愿意把事做好 因为我第一次衰了
野心>>>>>我<<<<<坏习惯
心理就不断被它们折磨着....
啦啦啦啦啦啦.....
很矛盾。很矛盾。很矛盾。
最后 我 全头都不到岸....=.=
what can i do...>.<
nothing else i can do...
hahahahaha
7.7.10
Excuse me~~Let me pessimistic for a moment....
This is my 1st time to text my blog in english.
I will try my best to express my mood.Hope i wont make too much mistakes.
Today i got a accident nearby TsunJin high school.My car was run into a nissan car.Fortunately,jux a little bit hollow...I wish i wont pay him in a high amount.
it was very awful!
At that moment,my mind was keep turning and turning...many many deals makes my mind so messy.
Project of Wedding course,English,Ielts test...
actually is not a big matter..
juz bcoz of my own personality problem.
My requirements that i set for myself are very strict,i always require myself to play a good performance whether it is on my study,my outlook,my....
i believe that when you r not talented enough you should and must pay more affort than those ppl who r talented...i always require myself to reach the higher and higher standard.Based on this matter,i cant even relax myself in every moments.Although i usually find some nice atmosphere restaurant to have some nice coffee,my mind still cant get rest and it will keep thinking,planning,managing,figuring....
The calendar is always beside me as well.
Without planning,i know i will definitely lose my direction...
I admitted that i am really a greedy girl.My desire is very strong.
I m eager to know all things.Even more crazy,i hope i can know all of those things and knowledge among this world.I can be get really frustrated and hate myself when i am facing some probelm or stuck in a way.
Approaching to new environment,learning new things new skills,chasing after some professional knowledge...
surely will make me very excited!!
I hope my horizon can be bigger and bigger...
Because of my greedy,now i m forcing myself.
Can i use "forcing" to describe it??
Rationally,i m eager myself to be a girl who has many accomplishment.
Thats way,I would like to be a professional guys...haha..really really greedy~~~~
Sometimes i will ask myself what am i doing...
I will always answer in a optimistic way
"Soo,U r chasing after ur dream...when a person who is approching to their dream they wont feel tired even they have sacrificed their time,their energy or even their soul too...cause u know the thing that u want is forthcoming...u r getting nearer and nearer to them..."
haha...mayb this kind of sentenceses,encouragement would able to inspire my soul to keep challenging,fighting...
When PPl is getting older,the more responsibilities they should bear.
Sometimes those responsibilities are absolutely make a adult exactly surrender on it.
The more responsibilities u bear,the more tired u will carry on.
But V cant do anythings,except accepted it and done it as well as u can.
Bcoz this in the alternative to prove urself are a useful and productive ppl.
Am i right??
Sometimes,substantial life is jux a way to pretent our insecurity and escaping only...
Anyway
Anyway
Anyway
I am not a pessimistic person
My RATIONALLY / MIND/DESIRE/PERSONALITY
tell me that
I should insist on it...
believe the outstanding ability of urself is the best way to make ur dream come true....
(at here,i juz wanna hav a space to split out my unhappy mood,after threw out all those negative thought i will get well soon...)
haha^^
Believe Me...I will done well...
Take my word on it
Bless myself
By wah
I will try my best to express my mood.Hope i wont make too much mistakes.
Today i got a accident nearby TsunJin high school.My car was run into a nissan car.Fortunately,jux a little bit hollow...I wish i wont pay him in a high amount.
it was very awful!
At that moment,my mind was keep turning and turning...many many deals makes my mind so messy.
Project of Wedding course,English,Ielts test...
actually is not a big matter..
juz bcoz of my own personality problem.
My requirements that i set for myself are very strict,i always require myself to play a good performance whether it is on my study,my outlook,my....
i believe that when you r not talented enough you should and must pay more affort than those ppl who r talented...i always require myself to reach the higher and higher standard.Based on this matter,i cant even relax myself in every moments.Although i usually find some nice atmosphere restaurant to have some nice coffee,my mind still cant get rest and it will keep thinking,planning,managing,figuring....
The calendar is always beside me as well.
Without planning,i know i will definitely lose my direction...
I admitted that i am really a greedy girl.My desire is very strong.
I m eager to know all things.Even more crazy,i hope i can know all of those things and knowledge among this world.I can be get really frustrated and hate myself when i am facing some probelm or stuck in a way.
Approaching to new environment,learning new things new skills,chasing after some professional knowledge...
surely will make me very excited!!
I hope my horizon can be bigger and bigger...
Because of my greedy,now i m forcing myself.
Can i use "forcing" to describe it??
Rationally,i m eager myself to be a girl who has many accomplishment.
Thats way,I would like to be a professional guys...haha..really really greedy~~~~
Sometimes i will ask myself what am i doing...
I will always answer in a optimistic way
"Soo,U r chasing after ur dream...when a person who is approching to their dream they wont feel tired even they have sacrificed their time,their energy or even their soul too...cause u know the thing that u want is forthcoming...u r getting nearer and nearer to them..."
haha...mayb this kind of sentenceses,encouragement would able to inspire my soul to keep challenging,fighting...
When PPl is getting older,the more responsibilities they should bear.
Sometimes those responsibilities are absolutely make a adult exactly surrender on it.
The more responsibilities u bear,the more tired u will carry on.
But V cant do anythings,except accepted it and done it as well as u can.
Bcoz this in the alternative to prove urself are a useful and productive ppl.
Am i right??
Sometimes,substantial life is jux a way to pretent our insecurity and escaping only...
Anyway
Anyway
Anyway
I am not a pessimistic person
My RATIONALLY / MIND/DESIRE/PERSONALITY
tell me that
I should insist on it...
believe the outstanding ability of urself is the best way to make ur dream come true....
(at here,i juz wanna hav a space to split out my unhappy mood,after threw out all those negative thought i will get well soon...)
haha^^
Believe Me...I will done well...
Take my word on it
Bless myself
By wah
3.7.10
我 很努力的活着
--------
现在的自己
努力得活着每一天
weekdays
上英文班
weekends
上婚礼课
我努力 努力 努力
的追求着我要的东西
我的外表
很刚强 有目标 吧
可惜
有时也是伪装的
那是理智的我的表现 和态度
我的脆弱
想找人懂
他
会是个不需多语
静静地
就可以明白我
这个
有时 理智 有时 坚强 有时 懒惰
有时 傻气 有时 无语 有时 无表情
的我....
如果我彻底的 信任 了你
我就会彻底的 傻里 傻气
因为我不需要防备
还在等待。。
很渴望，
但是
我就等随便找个人吗....？
上天是在整我
还是
更好的，还在路上呢....？
默默为自己祈祷
祝福我自己
祝福我自己的 路 前途 爱情 家人 朋友....
我不知道 接下来 会是什么
默默
努力
走下去.....
现在的自己
努力得活着每一天
weekdays
上英文班
weekends
上婚礼课
我努力 努力 努力
的追求着我要的东西
我的外表
很刚强 有目标 吧
可惜
有时也是伪装的
那是理智的我的表现 和态度
我的脆弱
想找人懂
他
会是个不需多语
静静地
就可以明白我
这个
有时 理智 有时 坚强 有时 懒惰
有时 傻气 有时 无语 有时 无表情
的我....
如果我彻底的 信任 了你
我就会彻底的 傻里 傻气
因为我不需要防备
还在等待。。
很渴望，
但是
我就等随便找个人吗....？
上天是在整我
还是
更好的，还在路上呢....？
默默为自己祈祷
祝福我自己
祝福我自己的 路 前途 爱情 家人 朋友....
我不知道 接下来 会是什么
默默
努力
走下去.....
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